This week has not been very good. I had a couple good days. When I say good days that means a few good hours. I did have a couple days that I was extremely depressed and couldn't stop crying. I have a lot on my mind. Worried about my son and his girlfriend, worried about my husband, worried about his job, worried about my daughter, worried about my mom, worried about everything!!
I did try to tell my husband I was having a hard time, that I was very depressed and didn't know why. I think I was trying to open the door to just talk about it. Bless his heart though, he doesn't know. I get so wishy washy, that I cannot blame him. I will get mad at him for bugging me and then I get mad at him for leaving me alone. Sometimes he just cannot win. He did try to help by getting me out of the house for a few hours a couple of nights.
I have an appointment with my work comp doctor tmro. I had planned on asking him to put me back on the anti-depressants. Well my attorney called me yesterday and told me that we are about to settle the mental health portion of my claim. That means they will not cover any of those meds once it is settled. So that is pointless to start if I can only take them for a month or less. This was upsetting but settling this part of the claim is something that we really need to do.
I don't understand how I can spend so much time laying in bed but not sleep. It is like my brain doesn't even shut off. I take sleeping pills at night and IF i am lucky they are good for 3 hours of sleep but that is about it. I am just so tired all the freaking time. I never have any energy for anything. I am soooo tired of being tired.
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